simple life

i love how sienna and i can always find some time to goof off while adam is busy toiling away on some project in the yard. this weekend it was the fountain. i've been wanting to sit out on the patio and listen to that water trickle for so many months now. and the dear heart decided that this would be the weekend to go get the new pump, clean out all of the muck and get it working for me.

it was such a simple day, really. not very eventful - but full of everything we needed.

sunshine poured out of the sky, water sprinkled like joy on us, and adam and i remembered how fun it is to just play...

old friends new acquaintences

we had such a lovely visit last weekend. our dear friends kawami and mahsea drove up from santa cruz and introduced us to their absolutely adorable daughter niara. as always with the evanses, the day was completely relaxed and full of laughter and discussion. kawami and i talking about the eckhart tolle book we are both reading, adam and mahsea talking politics and exchanging jabs as they watch their hometown teams (Red Sox / Yankees) play. they are both so genuine, passionate, intelligent, interesting. they are the kind of people that make you want to live a more meaningful and authentic life for yourself. after a beautiful moonlit walk through the neighborhood that evening, it was time for them to drive back home. so nice of them to make the trek up here and spend the day. they left me feeling soul-happy and rejuvenated after what had been a strange week for me; and wishing we lived closer.

Rrrrrrgh...

thoughts of last saturday morning with this little pajama-wearing pirate is making me smile today.

clean slate

I was looking through some photos of our trip to Massachusetts tonight and came across the ones I took at Sharde and Jesse's house. I wasn't sure I'd do a posting about that day. What to say? What to say... But there was an ease and happiness I felt that I wasn't expecting. And that, I want to remember.

Sometimes all it takes is a clean slate. An hour or two, when you let go of expectation, let go of old emotion, let go of ego and just take what the day has to offer you. This was that day. As Seb drove through chestnut hill and into jamaica plain, I looked out the window at the most beautiful sun filled morning. Here we were. All grown up, with our own children; going to connect with that part of our family that we’ve been disconnected from for so many years. I started to think about those days running around the House of Ra with its hardwood floors and rooms smelling of incense. I started to remember the people in our lives back then and the kind of casualness we experienced during those early years living in boston.

How life comes full circle.

To see Sharde and Jesse and Isaiah and the new baby was so wonderful. They have one of those beautiful old boston Victorian houses that I dream of owning and fixing up someday with a little TLC. Beautiful wood moulding and old wood floors restored to new. And those double wide doors that hideaway into the walls. It felt like home. A perfect place to ease the anxiety that sometimes accompanies a meeting like this.

Realizing again how much I look like my father and grandmother. Feeling grateful that somehow, through it all, we’ve arrived at this point – where we can bring our families – our children and all spend time together without the past casting its heavy shadow. Just a day – to be thankful for the present and what love we’ve managed to salvage after all these years.

100 miles : )

went on a 'recovery' run this morning. just my weekday 3 mile loop on the trail, and was pleasantly surprised to find this little certificate waiting for me when i plugged in. got me thinking, 'i'm not training for anything, but, maybe i should be?' my running still qualifies as meditation, therapy, joy, self-indulgence, really. and i'm afraid the minute i begin to train for something (gosh, its been so long since i used that word in that way), all the joy will be sucked right out of it. so for right now i'll stick with it serving as my daily high. no expectations. just air filling my lungs, music in my head, worries left behind...

100 miles down...how many more to go?

13.1 and still alive

life is full of unexpected surprises. when i woke up this morning, i decided that i would run ten. ten would be farther than i had run before. this was my mind's little challenge to my body. it was a beautiful day and i couldn't wait to get out into it. but as i approached ten, i realized that i was closer to that unthinkable (for me) half marathon milestone than i had ever been before. so i went for it! and how about that? i'm still alive...

the sky is calling

i think the crazier our life gets, the more adam and i seem to discover happiness in the simple things. last weekend was a perfect example.

the sky was an amazing blue and lined with those cool puffy 'dream' clouds you learn how to draw as a kid.

i found myself spending most of the day laying in the grass taking it all in. and just that would have been a beautiful and complete day.

but when the winds picked up in the afternoon - we decided to stroll over to the park and try out sienna's new kite.

i loved watching adam and her getting it all ready and getting it up into that amazing sky.

they sat curled up in each other for hours, watching the sky.

it was one of those days that reminds you how quickly life passes you by

when you don't stop and enjoy the simple things.

as i watched that little girl staring at the sky, all i could think about was how quickly she's growing - and how before we know it, she'll be all grown up.

i just hope, no matter how old she gets, she'll always make time for kite flying days.

as i watched adam laying in the grass, i saw him completely relaxed and present for the first time in a long, long time.

staring up at the sky, he looked so content and still. he whispered from the grass, "i don't think i've flown a kite in 20 years - this is so relaxing" i looked down and saw the clouds reflected in his eyes.

it was so simple. too simple. some string, a little plastic, and some wind.

maybe bald is best

thought i'd update you on the latest installment of the neverending hair saga. mum, since you've listened to me vacillate back and forth about 'just what to do' with my hair more than anyone - i thought you'd appreciate a little comic relief.

after finding *the* photo and bopping around to various salons and parlors here in sacramento - i got nothing but a few raised eyebrows. 'how can i get my hair to do this ?' i asked. "uh - you could be reborn as this woman" she laughed. i wasn't in the mood to play. she sent me away with a broken spirit and an overpriced bottle of curl activator.

which -

did absolutely nothing to achieve the look i was going for. i have natural curls. they need to be activated. you'd think it would work. right?



ooh, this could be working!

wait...it's not that cute at all...

yeah, no. definitely looks like i put my finger in a socket.

you'd think natural would be easy right? just fun, carefree, nappy ringlets. is that too much to ask?

i've come to the conclusion that locks are almost certainly the answer. there is just no other way i can run, shower, and go - every morning - without wearing my hear in a defeated bun. the alternative to this of course is to do what i did for so many terrible years - blowdrying my hair straight, then frying it to bits with the straightening comb or curling iron. i have neither the time nor desire to adopt that routine.

now its just about taking that leap.

till then, i'll count the days till this relaxer grows out...

happy wednesday : )

how much do i love this girl...

these shots of sienna with the wind blowing those curls are making me smile today : )

our little scooter butt

our little olivia is really starting to scoot. those precious days of her being completely immobile are long gone. our girl is officially on the move : )


each morning when i peer into her crib, i'm never certain which position i'll find her in. sometimes sideways, sometimes completely upside down; but always with that heart-melting, worry-erasing smile.

hmmm, there may be a lesson for me in there somewhere...